Humbug Day -- You might be a Scrooge if...

Your only holiday decoration is a rotting pumpkin.

The treats you leave for Santa include a banana, prune juice, and a venison steak.

Your version of "Ho Ho Ho" involves Pamela Anderson, Britney Spears and Lindsey Lohan.

The light display on your roof is in the shape of a middle finger.

If your idea of Christmas dinner is a 6-pack of Schlitz, a Slim-Jim, and a cheese log.

If you buy all of your Christmas Gifts in one night, at the same place you buy your gas and cigarettes.

The star on the top of your tree wears a business suit and answers to the name - "special prosecutor."

The only stockings you hang by the fireplace are fishnet.

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